I remember my first year of teaching, over thirty years ago, in a first-grade classroom. The social studies curriculum opened with a lesson on the difference between needs and wants. This is a topic I must admit, to which I had not given much thought.
The children although bright, were in the first seven year cycle of life, so learned best in an experiential way. The social studies lesson taught in an intellectual way, would go right over their heads. It got me thinking about needs and wants, and considering teaching strategies. It was a few years before my introduction to Waldorf education, the most commonsensical approach to education that I have come across, but my ideas were already aligned with it.
The indications of Waldorf education for the young child are an emphasis on schooling the will. Young children, starting with babies, have many wants and convincing ways of expressing them. It can be easy to confuse their wants with their needs. From the baby’s point of view, they need everything they want; they don’t know the difference. They are completely dependent on adults for both meeting their needs and discerning the difference between needs and wants.
Humans learn and grow best when their basic survival needs have been met. Those needs include nutrition, warmth, movement, safety, touch and adequate sleep. When adults provide what is needed with clear conviction, the child’s will is shaped in a healthy way; adult and child come into right relationship. There tends to be less conflict and more connection.
January is the time for resolutions and therefore, shoring up the will, including getting support as needed. For example, we often get in better physical shape when we follow the lead of a trainer at the gym, instead of our own will in choosing the best workout. Similarly, when adults lead young children in activities like meals, naptime, outdoor time, diaper changes, providing what the child needs instead of what they want, these are opportunities to learn the task at hand as well as shape and fortify the child’s will.
Indulging the child’s wants leads to an increase in wants and subsequent conflict or battle of wills. This can diminish the adult’s ability to fulfill the child’s needs, and weaken the child’s will although it appears to be the opposite. On the other hand, when the child’s needs are met and occasional wants, according to the adult’s determination, the child is satisfied with less, demands less and develops stronger will forces.
That’s the goal of educating the child’s will – a happy and satisfied child who accepts what is, determined in early childhood by loving adults who know what the child needs. We do not expect young children to know; it is an act of loving kindness and care to decide for them. Their will is best applied to practicing new physical and social skills in their play. Do your own experiments with this, determining your needs and wants and teaching children through practical encounters. What happens?
According to development theory and my personal experience, when the young child’s needs are consistently met, the ground is prepared to tend seeds within the soul, which Lynn Jericho referred to in her Inner Christmas messages as promises. Those messages inspired me to look at my humanity in a new way. I promise to write more on that topic in the next blogpost.
Sign up to receive notice of new posts to the blog on this page. Thank you.