Numbers and Stars
On my birthday, I want to thank my mother. She was a vessel for Life to express itself as me! I aim to fulfill that gift, allowing Life to express itself through me. Thanks to Mom and Life – I am celebrating another year around the sun.
The night I was born, there was a full moon low in the sky. This cosmic event coincided with my arrival and offers hints to the nature of my nature. I am a passionate soul and a seeker of wisdom. My life has never been dull.
Today, I am 66 years old, a number that is calling my attention. I enjoy numbers, playing around with numerology, and considering how everything is connected. The oneness of the universe intrigues and inspires me.
Pythagoras is one of the earliest known figures in the history of numerology. He claimed that man could grasp and explain the nature of the universe through number and form alone. He founded the first school to teach numerology in ancient Greece.
Exploring numerology, let’s consider that the numbers in the year 2022 add up to six. When a number or any other symbol repeats itself, I pay attention.
In numerology, the number six is the number of harmony, community relations, rewards of hard work, beauty and rhythm. Those traits are attributed to the planet Venus; they are my focus for the coming year.
The numbers for August 21, 2022, my 66th birthday, 8-21-2022 add up to 17. According to numerology, you add numbers until arriving at a single digit. Seven plus one is eight. Eight is the number of change, balance, transformation, and endurance. It is ruled by Saturn.
A sister science of numerology is astrology. When I have had my birth chart read, those two planets, Venus and Saturn have played a significant role. The numbers associated with those planets are connected to my birthday this year.
I am grateful to be in alignment with Life! Afterall, it’s inside, outside and all around me; resistance is futile. That’s a fact that has not stopped me from trying before but I’ve learned that resisting Life is the source of suffering so I let go.
When the stars and numbers align
Looking back on my life (a birthday ritual), I reflect on events; this year I am noticing them through the lens of numerology. I met my husband 33 years ago when I was 33-years-old. That means going forward, I have been in relationship with him longer than not. What a blessing to spend more than half of my life with him!
Remembering how I met my husband fills me with awe and gratitude for the wonder of Life. A parent of a child in my first grade class, asked me to stay with four of her five children while she visited a sibling who was at the end of life. I am one of eight children and accustomed to a full house. I said yes – a decision that led to a series of life-changing events.
When she returned, we had a special connection. She was working at a construction site and had met my husband who was the architect there. After declining the offer to double date a few times, I agreed to go. And that night, I met the most significant person for the rest of my life.
Who could have orchestrated that? Not I; only Life can make such wonders happen! It’s my job to show up and to trust Life to do the rest. I am grateful that I took the chance and said yes, even if it took three tries.
Looking back at the major events in my life, I recognize I did not make them happen. My job was and is to remain open, trusting, and willing to accept and do the work before me. Life, a power greater than me, takes care of the rest.
If I am struggling with things not happening as I planned, I can let go and trust that I am being led. How and when I reach the destination is not up to me. Detours and challenges are a part of Life’s way.
When I turned fifty, I went on a trip to Scotland with a group of women friends. I was coming to the end of the years of living with children in our home and struggling with acceptance of myself as a mother.
I decided to turn the physical trip into a pilgrimage, one that would help me to surrender to Life and to trust that all shall be well. What I needed to learn came to me on the trip and I recorded it in my journal.
Later, I wrote a book about the experience, Unpacking Guilt, A Mother’s Journey to Freedom. Before writing, I noticed what was happening in my mind, body, and soul. Then I practiced the lessons learned on the trip and noticed a year later what was happening internally. The things that had been weighing me down no longer did – I was free to go forward unbound (by them).
A special task presented itself – to open an early childhood center. I knew it was not only the most challenging thing I could do, but it was also something I was ready to take on. The thought that provided both comfort and courage was that everything I needed would come to me in just the right time. And it did!
Almost five years ago, I converted that business into a worker-cooperative and continue to work as a writer, teacher, and since January 2019, a grateful grandmother.
Opening Doors
The oldest grandson is now three and a half-years-old and both curious and excited about everything. When my brother and his family came to visit us, we heard the car pull in and went out to greet him. After he parked, there was a pause and our grandson commented, “He’s going to open the door!”.
That kind of childlike anticipation is how I feel on my birthday this year. I don’t know what or when things will happen, but I know Life will open doors for me.
If Life has always taken care of me, I can trust that it will continue to do so. As long as I align myself with it. Resisting Life is a waste of time and energy. The more I accept Life’s terms, the more ease and flow I experience.
According to Rudolf Steiner, “We must think only that whatever comes is given to us by a world-directive full of wisdom.” Challenges, joys, sorrows, successes, they are all a part of the process of awakening in me what I need to learn in this lifetime, preparing me to receive what comes.
“Trust in the ever present help of the spiritual world” (Steiner). From that place of trust, courage, enthusiasm and profound gratitude flows.
What Life brings to me is what I want – and beyond my wildest dreams! I choose to trust Life, do the work that’s before me, and be grateful for what comes. In this mode, stress and worry fall away, I open my arms to receive, and say thank you, thank you, thank you – again and again!
And yes to what Life has in store; I am ready, come what may.
A Verse for Our Time
- from Rudolf Steiner
We must eradicate from the soul
All fear and terror of what comes towards man out of the future.
We must acquire serenity
In all feelings and sensations about the future.
We must look forward with absolute equanimity
To everything that may come.
And we must think only that whatever comes
Is given to us by a world-directive full of wisdom.
It is part of what we must learn in this age,
namely, to live out of pure trust,
Without any security in existence.
Trust in the ever present help
Of the spiritual world.
Truly, nothing else will do
If our courage is not to fail us.
And let us seek the awakening from within ourselves
Every morning and every evening.
