Even with more free time, if we are bound to patterns of thinking, feeling, and doing, we may not experience freedom. One of the areas where many of us struggle is when our children are sick or suffering in some way. It might trigger guilt and the feeling that we should have prevented it from happening.
Allowing our children to learn and grow from life’s challenges is empowering to them. If we try to fix their problems, we are sending the message that we think they can’t do it themselves. When I discovered that guilt was getting in my way as a mother, I wrote a book called Unpacking Guilt, A Mother’s Journey to Freedom. I realized that holding onto guilt is like looking at spilled milk and feeling bad about it instead of getting out a sponge and cleaning it up.
Guilt is a normal part of parenting, of wanting the best for our children. Knowing what to do with it is a practice. According to Maya Angelou, “Do the best you can until you know better, then when you know better, do better.” The steps below are a practical way I’ve learned to do that. I hope you find it helpful!
Realize that guilt is a message not a punishment.
Receive the message.
Observe your feelings.
Question your behavior.
Is it serving the desired outcome?
Adjust your behavior.
Practice forgiveness.
Thank the message and
Release it.
Experience freedom!
Remember that our children want to do well. They don’t want to be disruptive or unable to go along with the program. It’s the job of parents to show children how to get along in society, how to behave appropriately and earn independence. This is a process that takes time which is why childhood in human beings lasts so long.
Mistakes are a normal part of the process. Guilt is a normal reaction to mistake-making. Receive the message and find your way to freedom!
Unpacking Guilt – A Mother’s Journey to Freedom
Price reduced to $9.99 for the month of May.
Unpacking Guilt final front cover https://judithfrizlen.com/portfolio/unpacking-guilt-a-mothers-journey-to-freed
Best wishes for a happy and healthy Mother’s Day!
